If ...

As we think back over 2009 and gear up for 2010, we remember all the ifs, ands, and buts in our lives ...

If you eat with Eden, you will never go hungry. BUT If you are a piece of toast, Eden will call you out by name and eat you {without sharing much}.
If you are eating cereal, Eden will want to eat with you - and likely out of your bowl with your spoon.

If you're a baby doll, you will never be clothed.

If you are a sheep Eden will accidentally call you a horse then realize you are, in fact, a sheep and say, very emphatically, "Baa! Baa!"

If you are a bow, you will be constantly pulled out of Eden's hair. But, as if torn, Eden will ask for help in putting you back in {and the cycle often continues for several itterations}.

If you are Aunt Sarah, Eden will call you Ashley over and over and when corrected will look at you like you are crazy.

If you are a drink cup or reading glasses accidentally left on the coffee table, you will be brought to your rightful owner immediately {even if that means spilling its contents all over the floor on her way}.

If you are a paci and Georgia, Eden will sometimes need to sit in her crib and relax with you for a bit in the middle of the morning or afternoon {sometimes this "relaxing" can last for 30 minutes}.

If you read a book with Eden where someone has something about to hit their head, is scared or crying or in an argument or lost or hurt or, well you get the idea, you must tell her that everything is going to be ok so she'll stop whimpering her concern for the characters.

If you want to cuddle with Eden, you can either read her some books or turn on PBS Kids, and she's yours for at least 20 minutes.

If you are a mirror, you will be licked.

If you are a baby bowl, you will be asked for by name then eaten out of and hugged.

If you are bathtub water you will be asked not to be poured on Eden's head, BUT you will be consumed either directly or indirectly {e.g., by sucking on a soaked washcloth or by sucking on a soaked finger}.

If you are a man you will be called Dada, and if you are a woman you will be called Mommy unless you are a man or women with grey hair - then you will be called Big Daddy or Mamma II respectively.

If you are shoes too big for her, you will be put on and waltzed around the house.

If you are a phone, Eden will need to hold you and talk on you.

If you come visit or come over for a playdate or just hang out a bit, you will be cried for when you leave.